Indiana Stickface and the Gap Year of Doom

No excuses this time, we just keep forgetting to update.

Thursday 30th June

This day was a driving day, which happened to involve going over the Bighorn Mountains. This proved to be a lot more successful than our drive the previous night; Sally the sat nav didn't get completely lost and put us on farm tracks to hotels that weren't there, and the roads themselves were remarkably cow-free. In fact, the roads were bloody wonderful, with hairpin after hairpin all the way up the mountain until we reached the top at 8500 feet, which we decided would be a good spot for a barbie. It didn't take us long to discover that we'd set up opposite a series of valleys that formed a bowl shape perfect for huge echoes, which kept us amused for far longer than it should have done. Back on the mountain roads, we passed various pretty lakes and streams amid the endless pine forest until suddenly, we found snow. In June. A brief attempt at a 9500 feet snowball fight later and we were heading down the mountain, which Dave (that's the car for those of you not paying attention. Wake up at the back!) wasn't too pleased about. A constant 10% gradient meant we had to stop halfway down to give the overheating brakes a little respite, and it gave us a chance to briefly admire the view, or what of it was visible through the rain. Once back on flat ground not much else of interest happened until we reached our overnight stop of Cody, Wyoming. Cody didn't have much to offer us in the way of evening entertainment apart from a miniature village and a dam, the visitor centre of which was closed, and we could only get so much enjoyment from a large slab of wet concrete.

HOD: Tim, for providing the most piercing echoes at lunchtime.
DOD: Guy, for breaking Ed's watch.

Friday 1st July - one month already!

This was our first day in the absolutely gorgeous Yellowstone National Park. Words really won't do any justice to this beautiful place, with the whole park blanketed in pine forests in front of snow-capped mountains, waterfalls and streams gushing down to crystal clear lakes. Our lunchtime stop was at a suitable altitude for a barbecue on 3ft deep snow (which has got to be a first) in among trees right next to an ice cold meltwater lake, which proved handy for washing up. From there we visited one of the geyser fields, this one containing the famous Old Faithful - or, as we renamed it, Old Sorry-I'm-Late-The-Traffic-Was-A-Nightmare-Oh-Are-You-All-Waiting-For-Me? It was predicted to go off at about 8.05, give or take ten minutes, but as 8.20 approached, the gathered crowd became quite restless, including a small troupe of Buddhist monks adjacent to us. Eventually, after another ten minutes or so, Old Faithful decided to go off after all, to a soothing chorus of "oooooh" and the occasional "aaaah" from the bald chaps in orange. With the next day in hand to further explore the park, we headed to the small - and astonishingly expensive - town of West Yellowstone for some kip.

DOD: Ed, for dropping steak through the barbecue grill.

Saturday 2nd July

The hotel pool had a slide! Dried and packed, we headed back into Yellowstone for further exploration, our first stop being another geyser field, where we spent an hour or so wandering about enjoying the exotic fragrance of sulphur. From there, we carried on through the stunning scenery until a small mountain loomed up ahead, and being the brave, courageous mean that we are, we decided to scale it. We braved grass, branches, scree, cliffs, squirrels, bears and ferocious elk - the latter two being even more sinister by their absence - and after some time we didn't reach the top and walked back to the car. Some more fearless exploration on the roads brought us to an almost-suitable barbecue spot. I say almost suitable, because despite the steak cooking quickly and tasting absolutely superb, there wasn't really anywhere to put out the charcoal. There was much smoke and mild terror upon the passing of a park ranger, but eventually we put the fire out using nothing other than sheer courage and the tools nature gave us, Simon's toolkit even stopping a passing family in their tracks. Leaving the park, a few more hours' drive brought us to our overnight stop of Pocatello, Idaho.

Sunday 3rd July

We were only a couple of hours away from Salt Lake City, where we would have to remain for a couple of days while we waited for a new temporary plate for Dave to reach us. When we arrived shortly after lunchtime we figured the city would provide us with bounteous opportunities for amusement. What we hadn't taken into consideration is that over half the population of Salt Lake City are members of the Church of Latter Day Saints, and do nothing on Sunday apart from sit in a large stone building with a cross on the top, with the result being that the rest of the city shuts down for a day. After brief deliberation and internet-checking, we decided to resort to a method of killing time honed on the hard streets of Manhattan, and went to the cinema for a spot of screen-hopping. Suitably amused, we returned to our room and retired, briefly taking a moment to optimistically ask the internet if any strangers would like to host four British people on Independence Day.

Monday 4th July
Independence Day (apparently that's quite a Big Thing over here, stealing their country from us)

Our cyber-optimism proved fruitful, as we woke to find an invitation from a nice Americanist called Brent to a barbecue. This left us with a day to kill, so all we could think to fill it with was a swimming pool and the wonders of BBC America, which was showing even more Top Gear during the day than Dave (the channel, not the car). Come 7ish, we drove across the city to the ironically (given the day) Monarch Avenue, where we met Brent, Paul and others and generally had a good evening. Our new American friends understood our plight as far as this country's draconian drinking age is concerned, and kept us suitably watered throughout the evening (apart from Tim, who as the designated driver enjoyed his single beer very much). The evening saw the aforementioned barbecue (our fourth in six days), marshmallows on an open fire, a trip up the valley to watch the fireworks over the entire city, and culminated in a tense poker game between Guy, Ed (too drunk by this point to understand anything), Brent and Paul while Simon slept (too drunk to be awake) and Tim amused himself with a guitar. Once Guy had suitably wiped the floor, we trundled back to our room.

HOD: Guy, for beating Americans at their own game (Texas Hold 'Em) on Independence Day - ha!
DOD: Simon for falling asleep during fireworks

Tuesday 5th July

With Simon nursing a particularly acute hangover, we did literally nothing all day. Highlights included making sure the car's plate got sent and doing some laundry. Sometimes we just need a day to rest in our hard-working summer, as we're sure you'll understand.